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How can parents splitting up affect a child?

Whatever your child’s age, they may experience a whole jumble of emotions due to a family breakup. These can range from sadness, anger and fear to jealousy and even anxiety.

While it can be upsetting to see your child in turmoil, it’s worth remembering that with the right support, they can successfully navigate their feelings and move forward.

Talking to your child about separation

You can help your child come to terms with what has happened in the following ways:

  • Be aware that your child might not want to hear what you have to say.
  • Go in gently, using words appropriate to their age.
  • Try to keep your explanation and answers to questions simple.
  • Reassure your child that this isn’t their fault.
  • Make it clear that both parents still love them.
  • Clearly explain your child’s new routine.
  • Let them ask as many questions as they need to.
  • Be as honest as you can, whilst keeping their age in mind.
  • Be prepared to explain what has happened many times.

A father helping his little girl to play the guitar

The benefits of child counselling

Separation can be a difficult time for everyone involved, especially for children. As a parent, you play a crucial role in supporting your child through this transition. It’s normal to feel overwhelmed but finding the help you need is essential to staying strong for your child.

In the meantime, they may benefit from professional support.
Here’s how:

  • Help to deal with big emotions
  • Opportunity to speak freely in an empathic, non-judgemental space.
  • Develop a healthy sense of self-worth.
  • Develop ways to cope with the new situation.
  • Build self-esteem and develop resilience.

Find a children’s therapist

Lorraine McDonnell

Adults’, Children and Young People’s therapy

Manchester

Specialises in integrative, person-centred, and CBT therapies. Offers support to cope with feelings of loss, mental health issues, and caregiving. Helps to build self-awareness, coping strategies, and empowerment.

 

Susan Hughes

Adults’, Children and Young People’s therapy

Accrington

Person-centred counsellor, who derives immense satisfaction from empowering people to overcome their challenges. Works with adults and adolescents across depression, anxiety, self-esteem and general well-being.