Sex therapy is a type of talking therapy that helps individuals and/or couples explore and work through difficulties with their sexual or intimate lives.
Everyone will encounter difficulties in their sex life at some point. If there are any issues playing on your mind, or you want to improve your physical connection with your partner, sex therapy can provide a space free from embarrassment or judgement.
“We explored how changes to my body were causing me anxiety, and how this in turn was impacting my body. I’d come to associate sex with pain, and the sessions with our therapist helped me unpack this. Since finishing our sessions, our sex life has improved a lot. As a result, we feel stronger as a couple.”
Many people assume sex therapy involves physical exercises or demonstrations.
It doesn’t.
What is sex therapy?
Sex therapy is talking therapy. There are no physical examinations, demonstrations or sexual contact involved in therapy sessions. It’s a conversation-based therapy, typically delivered in the same way as any other counselling session, either online or in-person.
Your therapist helps you understand what’s going on, explore the emotions and experiences that might be contributing to difficulties, and find practical ways forward that work for you and, if relevant, your partner.
Sex therapy can be attended individually or as a couple. Some issues are better explored alone first; others benefit from both partners being in the room together. Your therapist will help you figure out what’s right for your situation.
Sexual difficulties are more common than you think
Sexual difficulties are more common than people realise, and they’re rarely just about sex.
Stress, relationship dynamics, past experiences, health, and self-esteem can all play a role. Sex therapy helps you understand the whole picture.
Sexual difficulties can be connected to:
- stress
- anxiety
- relationships
- past experiences
- confidence and body image
- health
- changes in desire
- life events
When sex therapy can help
If you’ve lost interest in sex, or you and your partner have very different levels of desire, sex therapy can help you explore what’s driving that and find a way forward that feels right for both of you.
Erection difficulties, premature ejaculation, and delayed ejaculation are extremely common and highly treatable. Sex therapy looks at both the psychological and relational factors involved, without any shame attached.
Some people find it difficult or impossible to reach orgasm, either alone or with a partner. Sex therapy offers a safe space to explore this without pressure, and to develop a better understanding of your own body and responses.
Conditions like vaginismus or dyspareunia (painful sex) can have a significant impact on intimacy and relationships. A sex therapist can work with you on the psychological aspects alongside any medical treatment you may be receiving.
Feeling self-conscious, disconnected from your body, or anxious about intimacy can affect your sex life even when there’s no specific physical issue. Sex therapy helps you build a healthier, more positive relationship with yourself.
If you’re exploring questions around your sexual identity or orientation, and you’d like a confidential, non-judgmental space to do that, sex therapy can help.
Our sex therapy specialists
We’ve built our sex therapy service around what people actually need: a safe space, a therapist they feel comfortable with, and access when they’re ready, not months down the line.
All our sex therapists are fully qualified and registered with professional bodies. We verify their qualifications, memberships, DBS checks, and insurance before they join our platform.
Our therapists are specialists in sexual and relational wellbeing, with extensive experience supporting people through a wide range of intimate difficulties.
They bring specialist knowledge in psychosexual and relationship therapy, and they understand that every person’s situation is different. They won’t make assumptions, and they’ll always tailor their approach to you.
Not sure who to choose? Every therapist offers a free 15-minute connection call, so you can ask questions and see if they’re the right fit.
What to expect in sex therapy
How do I get started?
Book a free 15-minute connection call with your chosen therapist to ask any questions and make sure they feel like the right fit. If you’d prefer to dive straight in, you can book an initial session instead.
Sexual difficulties can be isolating. Waiting months for support makes that harder. We offer immediate access to qualified sex therapists with no waiting lists.
The first full session gives you and your therapist a chance to get to know each other, talk about what’s brought you to therapy, and agree on what you’d like to work towards.
What’s the typical session structure?
Sessions usually last 50 minutes. Your therapist will guide the conversation at a pace that feels comfortable for you. You won’t be pushed to discuss anything before you’re ready.
Sessions are available online, in person, and as a hybrid of both. Whether you prefer the privacy of attending from home or you’d rather attend face to face, we can work around your preference and your schedule.
There are no physical elements to sex therapy sessions. Everything is talked through, and your therapist may suggest exercises or reading to try between sessions at your own pace.
How is progress measured?
You’ll regularly review what’s working and what you’d like to adjust. Some people find a handful of sessions gives them the tools and understanding they need, while others prefer longer-term support. There’s no fixed timeline. It’s entirely up to you.
No. Sex therapy can be attended individually or as a couple. Many people start individually, and your therapist will help you work out what’s right for your situation.
No. Sex therapy at Now You’re Talking is entirely talk-based. Your therapist may suggest exercises to try in your own time, but sessions themselves involve no physical elements of any kind.
Whatever you share, you’ll be met with respect and understanding. Everything discussed in your sessions stays confidential. The only exception is if someone is at risk of serious harm, which your therapist will explain fully in your first session.
You don’t need to be in crisis to benefit. Sexual difficulties are often connected to wider relationship dynamics, communication patterns, or emotional distance. People come to sex therapy for all sorts of reasons, from long-standing difficulties to simply wanting to feel more confident or connected. Your therapist will look at the whole picture.
There’s no fixed answer. Some people find a few sessions give them what they need, while others prefer longer-term support. You’re in control of how long you continue.
Why choose Now You’re Talking
Now You’re Talking is a profit-with-purpose business. That means 66% of our profits goes back into our parent charity, TLC: Talk, Listen, Change, which funds support services for people affected by domestic abuse, relationship breakdown, and mental health challenges across the UK.
When you invest in your own wellbeing, you’re also helping others access the support they need.
Ready to find the right psychosexual therapist?
You don’t have to know exactly what you need before getting in touch. Browse our relationship therapists and book a free 15-minute connection call to talk through whether counselling could help.
Not sure if therapy is right for you?
Read our guide to help understand what happens during therapy and the therapist’s role in sessions to help you decide if it's right for you.
Read more